Digital Nicotine

Something New, Exciting but Scary

2009-06-12T17:18:00.004-04:00

I turned in my two week notice at work a little while back, and this upcoming Tuesday, the 16th, will be my last day at my current employer. I will no longer be a mattress salesman. I will be a window slash vinyl siding slash patio room salesman for a national company.

This is a calculated risk I am taking -- nothing ventured, nothing gained -- and the commission scale I am jumping up to has the potential to double my income. Yet I am leaving the safety net of guaranteed income and a job I know I'm good at, and this is, to be honest, a bit scary.

I will not fall on my face, yet I cannot deny that that is within the realm of possibility. In other words, I will try my damndest to make sure I will not fall on my face, and I believe in my capabilities and work ethic enough to succeed. But the race is not always to the swiftest....

Why am I posting this? Well, it's my blog, a so-called web log, so yeah, I can navel gaze about my personal issues all I want.

But also, in this economy, (and man that phrase, in this economy, has turned almost cliche pretty quick, hasn't it?) I think the best thing to do is to try to go upstream. Against the crowd. I know people are hurting out there, and folks are getting laid off and cutting expenses to get by, but when a good number of folks seem to be hunkering down, turtling into their shells, I am going to take my shot. Roll the dice. Make my move, etc.

I may be an optimist bordering on stupid, but so be it. Allstate Insurance has a TV commercial noting they were founded during The Depression. There are many other companies still thriving today that were as well. I'm not starting a business, I'm merely reaching for a higher rung. That's the American way.

Right now there are guys in a garage or in a dilapidated retail office sitting on plastic milk crates who a generation from now will be national names, despite this being potentially the worst recession since FDR.

My switching employers is scary, but I ain't scared -- much.

I'm also excited, and dreaming of the new opportunities before me. If I go down, I'm going down swinging like a sonuvabitch. And really, this isn't exactly a Profile in Courage. I have options if this does turn out to be a mistake.

Again, the reason I think I'm posting this is because I notice a bit too much pessimism out there. A pessimism that I'm afraid is a bit self fulfilling. Not I.

My current employer has been nothing but good to me, but it's time to move on.

To quote that jam band from Vermont: "This has all been wonderful, but now I'm on my way."

(And heck, if worse comes to worst, I can always teach.)

A Long Life Well Deserved

2009-05-19T17:22:00.003-04:00

Happy 100th birthday, Sir Nicholas Winton.

Gay Marriage... Merely the MacGuffin

2009-05-14T14:35:00.009-04:00

It was never really about gay marriage. It was just happened to be the MacGuffin. Carrie Prejean's recent slosh through the slime (released photos, medical records, called a bitch, the c-word, her parent's released divorce records, etc.) was over something much more basic, much more crude....

*****

I remember a little while back watching Craig Ferguson's late night show, and Ferguson didn't do his normal monologue. He stood before the cameras and said, No more. No more jokes about Brittney Spears.

She was shaving her head bald, going through a divorce, flashing her beaver exiting vehicles, and partying at a level that crossed from mere foolishness to dangerous self-destruction.

And it was supposedly hilarious. "That Brittney sure is dumb.... Sure is a slut.... Sure is a crazy bitch.... Sure is a has-been at 25."

Yuk yuk yuk. Hilarious stuff it all was. The pile on was severe, merciless, and in her face.

And in the midst of this, Ferguson essentially said, "Enough, this is not funny, I will no more be a part of this." (You can watch him here.) I happened to be fortunate enough to watch that original broadcast. I felt a tiny bit of shame because up to that point I had been passively cheering on all of the ugly spectacle.

*****

Man is a bullying creature. The better among us know we shouldn't, and while we have set up societal guards against it, occasionally we slip. We fall short of those standards we set for ourselves. It is our nature.

Of course, there are also those who embrace being a bully, and as always, going back to the schoolyard, they go after an easy target. And if possible, they work in packs.

In our media, there are elements that have become pretty adept at being facilitators to such bullying.

Brittney Spears became a target due to her odd fall from fame. Prejean's was an answer counter to the attitudes of a vocal number of our media elite. It cannot be emphasized enough that Prejean's off the cuff answer, in a silly environment like a beauty pageant, is the same of our current President. But Barack Obama is not an easy target. A 21-year old beauty queen is.

That answer was the MacGuffin, what allowed the process to begin, and any defenses of the treatment she received afterwards are merely rationalizations. Had Prejean managed to avoid that gay marriage question, many of the same folks taking aim at her now would instead be laughing at Lindsey Lohan for dyking it up, or the Octo-mom's severe mental issues, or whatever.

It ain't about politics. It ain't about gay marriage. Just an excuse, a rationalization, to get off berating somebody else to make you feel good about yourself.

That's what bullies do.

Sunday Mornings This Past Autumn, and Some Old Campaign Politics

2009-05-06T04:55:00.009-04:00

This past fall, I began to attend church again in a more regular fashion. The spiritual muscle needs flexing, yet I had let it get a bit flabby. It is a Lutheran Church I attend, straddling the border between the Highlands and downtown, and inside I was able to sing those old German hymns, and listen to the Pastor preach on Christ, the Prophets, redemption, hope, sin, salvation, and grace among other common themes.

I am not the world's greatest Christian, but I am working on it. (Then again, if you ever do meet someone claiming to be a great Christian, keep a hand on your wallet.)

This is a post that has been brewing for a while, but due to my lack of enthusiasm for blogging in general, and a genuine concern of descending into hackery on this subject in particular, I have held off. But I believe ideas are now sorted properly, and passions cooled a bit, so that I can go there with honesty and respect, and not point scoring or partisanship.

My church is directly across the street from a party headquarters of the local Democratic Party. This being the election season, they of course had a fairly large poster on their fence for Barack Obama. This poster didn't say "Obama for President" or "Obama/Biden" however; it simply said "Hope," with the now familiar circular Obama logo in the O, sans the art deco portrait of our current President.

And this was odd, coming out of the dimly lit church -- after hearing of Christ on the cross, and delving into those recurrent themes of grace, salvation, forgiveness, etc., to step outside into the sunny but brisk October day to see the word "hope" associated with... a politician.

*****

I write this now because Aunt B repeats a complaint I've heard among some Obama supporters, that conservatives mock their support of Obama as Messianic or worshipful in quality. She thinks he is, in her own words, "not that bad."

I take her word at it, and acknowledge that many of Obama's supporters are similar in attitude. They voted for the guy because of basic agreements on the issues. Yet it cannot be denied that when one thinks of how Obama campaigned, two general themes come to mind: that he was the man of Change, and that he was the man of Hope.

Hope was everywhere. Ubiquitous. When you thought hope, you thought Barack Obama. You couldn't escape it.

But let me quote Psalm 118 (vs. 8-9):

It is better to have faith in the Lord than to put one's hope in man.
It is better to have faith in the Lord than to put one's hope in rulers.

(An aside: this is the same Psalm of that famous passage, This is the day which the Lord has made; we will be full of joy and delight in it.)

Such skepticisms and admonishments to place your hope and trust in God rather than in some ruler -- some man -- is a fairly strong current running throughout the Bible. That Obama campaigned in direct contradiction to this sensibility, and that many bought into it, is jarring. It does lead to questioning whether those without religion in their lives -- and liberals are more likely to be secular than conservatives -- found something to fill that void, for at least one campaign season.

This phenomenon was one that neither the campaign nor the candidate, himself a professed Christian, did anything to discourage. Though the craziness of the campaign season has now tempered, some of that residue understandably still lingers. Thus the "Barack Obama, Hallowed be Thy Name" jokes.

PS: And don't forget that creepy Yes We Can video.

A Quick Comment on Washington's Prescription

2009-03-21T12:33:00.005-04:00

It seems to me that right now Washington is doing to the economy basically what doctors did to, well, Washington.

Our economy is ill, George Washington was ill.

Washington's doctors treated his ailments with mercury and bleeding, making his situation much worse, and quite possibly killing him by accident.

And today, in the city named after him, our leaders have examined our economy, and prescribed the same damn thing.

Dear Britain, Drop Dead

2009-03-09T15:20:00.002-04:00

This comes from the British Sunday Telegraph, describing why the first meeting between the new US President and the UK Prime Minister was so odd.

"The real views of many in Obama administration were laid bare by a State Department official involved in planning the Brown visit, who reacted with fury when questioned by The Sunday Telegraph about why the event was so low-key.

The official dismissed any notion of the special relationship, saying: "There's nothing special about Britain. You're just the same as the other 190 countries in the world. You shouldn't expect special treatment."

Uh....

I guess intentionally insulting and denigrating our strongest ally is part of that 'smart diplomacy' I keep hearing about from the Obama folks and their supporters.

HT: Ace

True MVPs

2009-02-18T22:01:00.006-05:00

I personally find Rick Reilly often obnoxious. Here, however, he connects with the sweet spot of the bat. His current column names who really should have won some baseball MVP awards if we take away the ill-gotten trophies from those who later admitted to being on steroids.

Hint: Albert Pujols comes out pretty well.

CBO: Recession to End Later This Year... With Absolutely no Stimulus

2009-02-08T23:15:00.002-05:00

That's right, the highly respected, non-partisan Congressional Budget Office not only says that the recession should end on its own during the second half of this year, but unemployment will stay below the levels seen during the '81-'82 recession.

CBO anticipates that the current recession, which started in December 2007, will last until the second half of 2009, making it the longest recession since World War II. (The longest such recessions otherwise, the 1973–1974 and 1981–1982 recessions, both lasted 16 months. If the current recession were to continue beyond midyear, it would last at least 19 months.) It could also be the deepest recession during the postwar period: By CBO’s estimates, economic output over the next two years will average 6.8 percent below its potential—that is, the level of output that would be produced if the economy’s resources were fully employed (see Figure 1). This ecession, however, may not result in the highest unemployment rate. That rate, in CBO’s forecast, rises to 9.2 percent by early 2010 (up from a low of 4.4 percent at the end of 2006) but is still below the 10.8 percent rate seen near the end of the 1981–1982 recession.

There is no need for this country to go an additional $800 billion in debt. This is simply a convenient crisis for the party currently in power.

Jokes

2009-02-06T11:21:00.005-05:00

Last night, after watching the news on the local NBC affiliate, The Tonight Show came on.

The gist of the opening monologue joke:

~ "Boy, those Democrats sure don't pay their taxes."

The gist of the second joke:

~ "Why are Democrats going to a luxury resort to do some strategery, when there is this place called the Capitol Building where they can do the exact same thing?"

The gist of the third joke:

~ "The stimulus is itself a joke. There's an actual appropriation in there for $2 million for neon light installation for Las Vegas"

The fourth joke was then an easy Blago corruption joke.

Later, during a skit featuring Fred Willard as a Postmaster "Colonel," Leno asked why he hasn't been promoted to Postmaster General. Answer: "I didn't pay my taxes."

No jokes on Bush. None on McCain or Palin, or Republicans in general.

The water in the tub may have sloshed the Democrats way lately, but what I unexpectedly happened on last night is a sign that it may slosh back to Republicans much sooner than normal. By making the foundation of their entire governing philosophy the past eight years a crude "not-Bush," the removal of Bush has now also removed the foundation on which Washington Democrats stood.

All they've got now are a gaggle of -- admittedly usually sincere -- liberal special-interest groups pressing them one way (aka: money for appropriations in the "stimulus"), desires for grubby fat-laden pork pushing them another (aka: money for appropriations in the "stimulus"), a startlingly unimpressive leadership class among high ranking Democrats, and no true philosophical guide to guidance.

It's actually not that funny.

No Smoot-Hawley v2.0? Hopefully

2009-02-03T22:58:00.004-05:00

It looks like President Obama has come out against the Buy American clause of the bailout.

This is good news. While I still consider the bailout an unconscionable ratio of fat to beef, the removal of this potential trade-war-inducing bit makes the bill at least somewhat more palatable.

You take what you can get. I'll gladly take this.

(3.8%)

2009-01-30T19:39:00.011-05:00

[If this post had a subtitle, it would be, "I can't quit you, you Internets."]

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!

The economy shrunk 3.8% in the last quarter, the worst since 1982!!

[...]

Wait a second... 1982? Don't get me wrong, that was a bad quarter we had, and as someone in sales, it has affected me personally. But 1982, in the great scheme of things, is not that long ago. The 3.8% drop is actually considered much better than what some economists feared, a drop of over 5%. For all of 2008 the GDP actually rose by a paltry, but still positive, 1.3 percent.

The sky is not falling. Repeat, the sky is not falling.

Concerning 1982, while it wasn't exactly the best year economically, neither was it the stuff of lore. You don't see grandma and grandpa in their rocking chairs, gathering the children together, telling the tales of those great trials and tribulations, those breadlines and joblines, of that annum horribilis -- 1982.

Heck, by 1984, things were so much better that President Reagan was using "Morning in America" to wipeout Walter Mondale in a manner that puts Obama's win over McCain -- while solid -- in a bit of perspective.

Looking at the $819 billion dollar "stimulus" (yes, I'm using irony quotes) it seems more like a cure worse than the disease. Democrats have been out of power for a while, and this $819 billion seems more like a spending spree, a celebratory "We're back and we got money" moment. A bunch of Carrie Bradshaws, shopping for designer shoes on the taxpayers dime.

As Rahm Emmanuel said, "Never let a serious crisis go to waste."

Unfortunately, the Republicans during the first six years of the Bush administration didn't see an appropriation they didn't like, and lost a lot of the credibility they held as the party of financial responsibility. However, that is a credibility Democrats never held, and the American people may be remembering that. The poll numbers supporting the stimulus have been dropping steadily.

And more importantly, the non-partisan and highly respected Congressional Budget Office has determined that the overwhelming majority of the $819 billion won't even be spent in the next two years, and that speeding up that spending would be impractical and reckless.

To add upon that, the Buy American clause within the stimulus, while sounding good and patriotic, may in fact lead to a trade war between the US and our trading partners, Europe and China chief among them.

Trade wars and tariffs during an economic downturn? Go and google "Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act." I dare you. And did you notice the year that act was passed? 1930. Now that was an annum horribilis!

I could go on, but you get the point.

Times are not good. They are, in fact, bad. But they're not horrible. They are not wretched. They are highly precedented and common. They do not require a rushed through, pork-laden stimulus that reeks more of political back scratching. The $819 billion stimulus will pass. The Democratic votes are there for it, no matter what the Republicans do.

But that means the Democrats own it.

When the economy recovers -- in six months, nine, at worst twelve, it always does -- people will look back and wonder, "Was that $819 billion (a whole helluva lot of money) really necessary?" And by that time, it will have been after the fact gone over with a fine tooth comb. What is rushed through today may be an embarrasement tomorrow.

So why can't the stimulus be gone over before then? If all of that money, according to the CBO, cannot be spent wisely within two years anyway...

Why spend it in the first place?

And Thanks For All The Fish (The End?)

2009-01-15T13:19:00.005-05:00

This is the 827th post of Digital Nicotine. It may also be the last. I don't know.

For a professional, or semi-pro, blogging is an excellent venue. And there is a future out there in cyber-world. And the old media will have to change or die. Burn, baby, burn.

But I came on here back in '05 as an escape when I was working a brain numbing dead-end job for a pittance of a wage. Since then I have significantly upgraded my pay, bought a house, and got engaged.

What was once an escape, a vent and pleasure, is now a source of chore and battle. Reading this post by Aunt B just encapsulated for me how stupid and petty it all is. No, Hobbs does not think that what Williams did is actually the same as the betrayal of Christ, nor does anybody else who alludes to that common phraseology to describe a traitor, i.e.: a Judas. But words and intentions are twisted for convenience. Easier access for mockability.

And you best believe it's not just B doing this. It's damn near everybody. Right and left, liberal and conservative. And yes, I've been guilty too. Everybody in a damn competition to see who can be more clever than the next. Who can score the points. Who gets scored upon.

Recently, I haven't had the time to keep up. Been thinking about it recently, I haven't really wanted to keep up.

Say Uncle, whom I did not link enough during this bloggin run, once said, "I do this for me."

Words of wisdom.

Everybody, thanks for reading and commenting, it's been more good times than bad. As potentially my last post, I'd like to end all this with some E. A. Housman. Great poet, great poem. Somehow, this particular bit of verse captures how I feel.

*****

From "A Shropshire Lad"

LXII. Terence, this is stupid stuff

‘TERENCE, this is stupid stuff:
You eat your victuals fast enough;
There can’t be much amiss, ’tis clear,
To see the rate you drink your beer.
But oh, good Lord, the verse you make, 5
It gives a chap the belly-ache.
The cow, the old cow, she is dead;
It sleeps well, the horned head:
We poor lads, ’tis our turn now
To hear such tunes as killed the cow. 10
Pretty friendship ’tis to rhyme
Your friends to death before their time
Moping melancholy mad:
Come, pipe a tune to dance to, lad.’

Why, if ’tis dancing you would be, 15
There’s brisker pipes than poetry.
Say, for what were hop-yards meant,
Or why was Burton built on Trent?
Oh many a peer of England brews
Livelier liquor than the Muse, 20
And malt does more than Milton can
To justify God’s ways to man.
Ale, man, ale’s the stuff to drink
For fellows whom it hurts to think:
Look into the pewter pot 25
To see the world as the world’s not.
And faith, ’tis pleasant till ’tis past:
The mischief is that ’twill not last.
Oh I have been to Ludlow fair
And left my necktie God knows where, 30
And carried half way home, or near,
Pints and quarts of Ludlow beer:
Then the world seemed none so bad,
And I myself a sterling lad;
And down in lovely muck I’ve lain, 35
Happy till I woke again.
Then I saw the morning sky:
Heigho, the tale was all a lie;
The world, it was the old world yet,
I was I, my things were wet, 40
And nothing now remained to do
But begin the game anew.

Therefore, since the world has still
Much good, but much less good than ill,
And while the sun and moon endure 45
Luck’s a chance, but trouble’s sure,
I’d face it as a wise man would,
And train for ill and not for good.
’Tis true, the stuff I bring for sale
Is not so brisk a brew as ale: 50
Out of a stem that scored the hand
I wrung it in a weary land.
But take it: if the smack is sour,
The better for the embittered hour;
It should do good to heart and head 55
When your soul is in my soul’s stead;
And I will friend you, if I may,
In the dark and cloudy day.

There was a king reigned in the East:
There, when kings will sit to feast, 60
They get their fill before they think
With poisoned meat and poisoned drink.
He gathered all the springs to birth
From the many-venomed earth;
First a little, thence to more, 65
He sampled all her killing store;
And easy, smiling, seasoned sound,
Sate the king when healths went round.
They put arsenic in his meat
And stared aghast to watch him eat; 70
They poured strychnine in his cup
And shook to see him drink it up:
They shook, they stared as white’s their shirt:
Them it was their poison hurt.
—I tell the tale that I heard told. 75
Mithridates, he died old.

Brrrrr!

2009-01-15T11:25:00.003-05:00

Some mornings there is no need for coffee. Such as this one, when I stepped out of the house and the wind hit me. (Bit me... smacked me... bitch slapped me, etc.) The bank thermostat I passed on the way to work said it was ten degrees.

Nope. No coffee needed today, because I am wide wide awake after that.

Though some hot cocoa would be really nice about now.

I Normally Don't Cuss, So That's My Warning For This Post, Cause I'm Gonna Go Off on This...

2009-01-13T23:36:00.006-05:00

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

Did. You. See. That. Game.

Jodie Meeks!

15 of 22 from the field. 14 of 14 from the line. 10 of 15 from behind the damn arc!

54 points! All time UK record! Passing Dan fucking Issel! In a win against a ranked team!

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

[Pause]

[Pause]

Holy. Fucking. Shit.

Bacon!!

2009-01-10T03:54:00.003-05:00

Bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon bacon...

BACON!!

BACON!!

It's Not The Words Per Se, But To Whom the Words Were Directed At

2009-01-09T23:36:00.006-05:00

Came across this link to famous last words, very interesting enough, and the last one listed is by Karl Marx.

Here is the quote, and the description of the situation surrounding it.

"Go on, get out -- last words are for fools who haven't said enough." -- Revolutionary Karl Marx to his housekeeper, who urged him to tell her his last words so she could write them down.

Catch that? The last words Marx spoke were to his housekeeper. His housekeeper! Someone he or an associate paid... to serve... him.

Servants of the world, unite?

Appropriately illuminating. The man whom Marxism was named after could not, in his final moments, come close to living the philosophy he advocated. A foreshadowing of the futility of many of the violent Marx-inspired revolutions in the 20th century to come.

Note the Ciggarette

2009-01-04T22:04:00.005-05:00

From the guys at Powerline:

"Many liberals enjoyed the disgusting attacks on President Bush by anti-American critics around the world. It will be interesting to see how they react when Obama is the target."

Interesting indeed.

Quick Comment on Our Political Leadership

2008-12-31T13:04:00.004-05:00

Post-election, as Barack Obama has been selecting his cabinet, the rest of the entire Democratic party had only two responsibilities of importance. One was to fill Obama's vacated Senate seat in Illinois, the other was Hillary Clinton's Senate seat in New York.

How's that going? Answer: You almost feel circus music should be playing in the background, considering the farce both have become.

And the Republicans, still licking their wounds from November, how are they taking advantage of this?

Answer: By getting themselves into a situation where most headlines discussing them nowadays have the word "negro" in it.

Yeah...

I think I'll treat myself on this New Year's Eve, and drink the good stuff.

Merry Christmas, and Some Good Cheer

2008-12-24T15:42:00.003-05:00

I'll be out of here celebrating Christmas, and visiting the family. Hope you all have a good one too. The fiance is feeling a bit sick right now, so we may or may not make it to the Christmas Eve candlelight at church tonight, but besides that obvious and original reason for good cheer this holiday, I bring you another one I came across today.

It appears that researchers have found a possible trigger of Alzheimer's, a "slow, chronic reduction of blood sugar to the brain."

Good stuff. Very good stuff.

Merry Christmas. Peace and goodwill to you all.

Screaming at Grendel From Lake Forest, CA

2008-12-23T16:37:00.006-05:00

With the recent passing of Jerry Falwell, and Pat Robertson's age and general nuttiness at this point making him semi-retired, that large subset within activist liberalism that is hotly anti-religion has been without a Grendel.

No dark unthinking monster to fear and rage at. To whimper from. No abhorrent creature from the slimy depths threatening to come and render limb from torso.

No personification at which to build up and direct all collected antipathies. All venoms, loathings, and yes, bigotries, for all that is religious (and especially that which is mainstream Christian) at which to scream at. That loud piercing animalistic scream of terror and hatred. That sweet horrible catharsis.

*****

And then Obama tapped Rick Warren to give the invocation at his inaguration. Warren, with his rather unremarkable view that marriage is only a man/woman thing.

And Grendel is found. Rejoice.

Now scream.

Good Samaritans Not Needed in California

2008-12-20T12:12:00.003-05:00

I'm sure readers are familiar of the Good Samaritan rule when it comes to coming across an accident or emergency. If in good faith a non-medical professional does their best to administer care in such an emergency, they are not liable to be sued for trying to do the right thing.

The established thinking is that any miscare accidently given is far overweighed by the benefits of having neighbors taking care of neighbor in an emergency where a medical professional doesn't happen to be present.

The California Supreme Court... nevermind.

The original LA Times story is here, and here's where I came across this.

A Good Point Concerning Our President Elect Concerning This Mess

2008-12-14T14:56:00.004-05:00

Steve Chapman of the Chicago Tribune, talking about Obama concerning Rod Blagojevich.

"...[T]hough he is not of the Democratic machine, he has never been exactly against it. Former congressman and federal judge Abner Mikva said of Blagojevich, "You don't get through Chicago like Barack Obama did unless you know how to avoid people like that." Note the verb: not "challenge" but "avoid." His approach to old-style politics was wary coexistence."

While it is good to know that Obama probably didn't play ball with the Illinois governor, the odd way he has responded -- the hesitation and vagueness -- has people noticing.

My hunch, and this is a strong one, is that Obama and his team did what was normally done during his time swirling around in the Chicago political scene. He kept himself above it, he knew who and what to avoid, but he didn't exactly go all Elliott Ness on the corruptness within his party. Hell, he didn't even go Sarah Palin on it, whose selection on the GOP ticket was in part due to her taking on the corrupt establishment within her own state party.

Obama and his team didn't take the bribe. That's good. But were they offered one? No biggie if they were... unless they failed to report it. That's the question.

For A Newspaper Lady, Do I Write my Poesy

2008-12-09T17:07:00.003-05:00

A Sonnet, Dedicated to the lovely T----

In tiny Hoots a lone newspaper woman
Patrols the taverns, pubs, and chain eateries
In constant search of what? Perhaps... the Truth?
Perhaps Bigfoot is what she seeks to find.
In Hoots one must pack heat, so unawares
Will not be her when appears in gory horror
Undead abominations shuffling past
The local campus, mumbling sickly groans
In search... oh my... the damned, unholy cry:
Brains!! -- Brains!! -- You hear their call!? -- Brains!!
They seek to satisfy a hunger never
Capable of satiation. So with the true
and loyal Mabel next to her, our gal,
Newscoma, will tread her beat with diligence.

*****

A gift for you, because you seem a little frazzled right now and deserving of one. That, and I haven't tried my hand at blank verse in a while. I hope you like this bit of doggerel.

PS: Blank verse is hard.

Roughage in a Cup

2008-12-07T15:50:00.003-05:00

Ever take that last drink of coffee from the cup -- bought at a Starbucks, mind you -- and discover what feels like a full teaspoon of grounds at the bottom as they cascade down your unexpecting throat, causing you to choke and cough?

Good times.

Whatever Happened to "You Shouldn't Post Any Embarrassing Pictures of Yourself on Facebook?"

2008-12-05T17:10:00.007-05:00

I tell you, this picture of some Obama volunteer groping the cardboard breast of Sen. Clinton is pretty embarrassing.

Actually, it's not just some Obama volunteer. It's his chief speechwriter, Jon Favreau, getting to second base with the cut out.

Not to be confused with the Jon Favreau of the infamous answering machine scene from Swingers.

This should be an interesting four years.

A Politician By Any Other Name

2008-12-05T16:55:00.003-05:00

This story says that a Bush, namely Jeb, is considering a run for the Senate to replace retiring Sen. Mel Martinez down in Florida.

Meanwhile, this story says that up in New York a Kennedy, namely Caroline, is a front runner to be appointed to the Senate seat being vacated by a Clinton, namely Hillary.

I'm guessing there wasn't an Adams, Harrison, or Roosevelt available.

Blogging on Casualties, Shopping or Otherwise, Part 3

2008-12-02T12:43:00.004-05:00

I didn't mean for this to become a series, but this just amazed me. The NY Times published an article on the Wal-Mart trampling, and their headline is something else.

"A Shopping Guernica Captures the Moment."

Really... Guernica? The Grey Lady, the supposed "Paper of Record" and standard of excellence in all things journalism, is comparing a freakish accident at a big box retailer that claimed one life, to Guernica and the ascendency of European fascism in the 1930s?

Good to know the folks at the NY Times have that highly attuned sense of perspective needed from our elites. Especially compared to all those wild-eyed bloggers out there thrashing about.

Blogging on Casualties, Shopping or Otherwise, Part 2

2008-11-30T23:04:00.003-05:00

Well, this kinda demonstrates the point I was making in the immediate lower post concerning the death of a Wal-Mart employee on Black Friday.

"While I did have a legitimate point to make, it just didn't feel right. The victim was now a weapon, and I was wielding him like a blunt cudgel, swinging him about to bash at those who may disagree with me on the particular issue I was going to post about."

We now have union officials taking the body of the victim, Jdimytai Damour, firmly planting both feet on it, and standing on his corpse as if it were a soapbox. Why shouldn't they take advantage of this horrible situation to score some cheap and easy points in their perpetual drive to unionize the retail giant?

Like I hinted at earlier, you know it when you see it.

Blogging on Casualties, Shopping or Otherwise

2008-11-29T11:41:00.013-05:00

This post was always going to be on the trampling of a Wal-Mart employee yesterday. But before I clicked Publish Post, I read over what I had typed.

So I decided to add a post script for clarification. Then I read over again what I had written, thought about it some more, and deleted the entire post and typed this instead.

A common type of blogger's post is to pick out an interesting news story, link to it, and use it for a soapbox to make a point. It's what we do, even when it concerns tragedies, casualties, or catastrophes.

Which is fine, necessary in a way, and needs no apology. But after reading my unpublished and now deleted post, a bit of an epiphany struck on how I was using that Wal-Mart death.

Let's just say, not as I should. Irreverent snark is too easy. Too cheap. (It's getting to the point that I hate to even use that word, snark.)

While I did have a legitimate point to make, it just didn't feel right. The victim was now a weapon, and I was wielding him like a blunt cudgel, swinging him about to bash at those who may disagree with me on the particular issue I was going to post about.

Not to say referencing a death in the news is not often necessary to the discussions of the day. There needs to be some serious discussion of what happened Friday morning. It does speak to some bigger things.

But what is proper? I don't claim to know. To codify rules on how not to cross that line into disrespect, cheapness, or partisan hackery, seems tedious and stultifying to the license needed to ensure an invigorating debate. There is already an overabundance of concern for the sensibilities of others, to the detriment of frank and open discussion.

This is especially true when, concerning this subject, that old guideline on pornography serves us perfectly fine.

On this Eve of Thanksgiving

2008-11-26T23:53:00.003-05:00

I was going to do one of those nice mushy posts on what I'm thankful for, but as I got on the Internet, I first heard about the situation in India.

Simply horrible and evil. There may and will be things to elaborate on in the future, but now is not the time. Thoughts and prayers for the innocents affected.

And you all have a good Thanksgiving.

Three Snippets On The Media, And Some Eggs

2008-11-23T13:41:00.006-05:00

From VDH:

Second, if we should see in January that the government really does not want to evict Khalid Sheik Mohammed & co. from Guantanamo, and does want to stay in Iraq until 2011 to finish up, and does want to let the present tax code ride for a bit, and does want to leave most Bush-enacted homeland security measures in place, then Obama has not merely embarrassed his hard-left base, but has terribly humiliated the media as well.

[snip]

I do think that the media's unprofessional lobbying for the cause of Obama—not now, but in a decade or two—will become a classic case study in any graduate class on journalistic ethics."

And this Politico story featuring Mark Halperin of Time:

It's the most disgusting failure of people in our business since the Iraq war," Halperin said at a panel of media analysts. "It was extreme bias, extreme pro-Obama coverage."

Halperin, who maintains Time's political site "The Page," cited two New York Times articles as examples of the divergent coverage of the two candidates.

"The example that I use, at the end of the campaign, was the two profiles that The New York Times ran of the potential first ladies," Halperin said. "The story about Cindy McCain was vicious. It looked for every negative thing they could find about her and it case her in an extraordinarily negative light. It didn't talk about her work, for instance, as a mother for her children, and they cherry-picked every negative thing that's ever been written about her."

And third, this result from the folks at Pew Research:

"Voters overwhelmingly believe that the media wants Barack Obama to win the presidential election. By a margin of 70%-9%, Americans say most journalists want to see Obama, not John McCain, win on Nov. 4. Another 8% say journalists don't favor either candidate, and 13% say they don't know which candidate most reporters support."

The media took all the stature, credibility, and trust it has slowly -- deadline after deadline, fact check after fact check, editor's decision after editor's decision -- accumulated over the generations, and spent it all in one campaign season to get Barack Obama elected. He's their darling. He's their hope. He is, most importantly, their all-eggs-in-one-basket investment.

Is there anyway that Obama can be worth it? And should that basket drop, what then? All for naught?

Thirty

2008-11-22T10:31:00.006-05:00

Yesterday, November 21, I turned 30. Actually, I think I turned 30 in a more metaphysical sense six to eight months ago, because when you're 29 you know you are in the twilight of any claims to being in your youth, and you adjust yourself accordingly. But calendar wise, it was thirty years ago yesterday that I came into this world kicking and screaming, my mom and dad's first child, and given my father's name with the Junior suffix.

Yesterday was a good day.

My brother Micah called me. At 7:00 am. He thought it was funny.

Off work, I slept in a bit and met my fiance and mom for lunch at The Colonnade, a local establishment on the fifth floor of The Antique Mall. They serve what can only be described as the Platonic ideal of tomato soup. I'm serious, the absolute best soup I have ever had in my thirty years on this planet.

Next, I went out to my grandfathers place to finish up on the sidewalk project that would never end, and in the bracing wind all but completed that project. Afterwards, we went inside and he showed me his progress on the genealogy project he loves to work on. That old man has traced many of his ancestors, and therefore my ancestors, back to those who petitioned for pensions due to their service in the Revolutionary War. Many other branches he has traced back to arrivees from France and Ireland.

Grandma, despite her age-induced senility, was fairly lucid and in a chipper mood. If that dullness of the mental blade that is advanced old age affects behavior like alcohol, revealing the true nature of a person, then my grandmother must be one of the sweetest persons to ever walk this planet. I've always known that about her anyway, it's just nice as I get older to more appreciate it.

I drove back to the house, and as the early dusk of late November darkened the sky, I was able to get home soon enough to get out the circular saw and cut a few pieces of lumber for a table I am making. One of the problems with living in a shotgun is that space is limited and often awkward. I have little counter space in my kitchen, but I do have a very inconveniently located washer/dryer set. So I am making a table that will fit over the clothes dryer to create more space for cooking and storage.

To say that my carpentry skills are of a novice, would almost be an insult to novice carpenters. But I believe I can manage to make this thing sturdy, level, and by coating it with the red paint I used on my cabinets, blended nicely into the kitchen. If I pull this off, I will be bursting with sad extravagant amounts of he-man masculine pride. "I made this table.... (grunt) Look upon it woman... See where you may now prepare your pasta salads... (grunt) Come here now, so I may have my way with you..."

Not quite that bad, but close.

My dad called later that night, wishing me a happy birthday, cracking a joke that all the young radicals can no longer trust me. He also said that his thirties were maybe the best years of his life. I think they may be mine too.

Finally, that night was poker night with the boys. I went in with $40, and left four hours later with $32. That is how it usually goes. Someone will go home a big winner, someone will get busted, and everybody else leaves a few dollars ahead or behind.

I arrived home late, and found the birthday gift that the fiance and her parents bought for me. A Nintendo Wii. I was almost embarrassed, because they really shouldn't have spent that much money on me, but at the same time, yeah, I was excited. That's how my birthday beginning my 31st year, the year when all pretense to youth is over, ended. Me excited over a video game system.

It is a fun irony, and just because I am no longer young and have no excuses for immaturity, it does not mean that I am not allowed to download Contra and battle Red Falcon.

Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A Start! You never forget.

No Girls Allowed!

2008-11-20T11:20:00.005-05:00

There's just something about tree houses.

From Popular Mechanics.

Water's Edge, And All That

2008-11-19T11:25:00.008-05:00

I came across this, got surprised, and then honestly felt a quick little surge of anger about it.

I have some issues with the incoming President, but I hope Obama makes him bite a chunk of Predator drone launched missle before all is said and done.

Buy American

2008-11-10T22:02:00.007-05:00

In the local paper:

Toyota rolled its first Venza wagon off the factory floor in Georgetown, Ky., today as the automaker tries to push further into the small vehicle market.

[snip]

The Venza, which is built on the platform of Toyota's mid-size Camry sedan, will be sold exclusively in North America, it said. The Venza's factory, Toyota Motor Manufacturing Kentucky Inc., is Toyota's largest in North America.

Toyota, the No. 1 Japanese automaker by sales, has taken a beating from the difficult auto market in the U.S. in recent months. Last week, it said its U.S. sales tumbled 23 percent in October and issued a grim profit forecast for its fiscal year.

However, it remains in better shape than its Detroit competitors. On Friday, both General Motors Corp. and Ford Motor Co. reported heavy third-quarter losses, and GM said it could reach the minimum cash needed to operate its business next year.

I want to note something. Toyota is asking Americans to voluntarily spend part of their paycheck buying their product, which is fair enough. That's business, that's how the economy works.

What they are not doing is asking Congress to have American paychecks involuntarily spent via taxes to bail them out from their own incompetence.

That's what Ford, GM, and Chrysler are doing. That's not how the game is supposed to be played.

PS: Toyota employs over 7400 Kentuckians, making it the fourth largest private employer in the commonwealth. And no, I have not been paid to say any of this, though I would not be opposed to the idea.

A Fannie Mae Chairwoman for Attorney General?

2008-11-09T21:15:00.009-05:00

From the New York Times:

Some conservative bloggers have already begun trying to derail Ms. Gorelick’s possible nomination as attorney general, pointing to her experiences at both Fannie Mae and the Sept. 11 commission.

Add Digital Nicotine to that list. Ms. Gorelick, is Jamie Gorelick, vice-chairwoman from 1998 to 2003 of Fannie Mae. You remember Fannie Mae, the bailed out mortgage giant with severe accounting problem? The GSE, along with Freddie Mac, whose irresponsibility may have been the triggers of the...

[dramatic echo]Great Bailout of 2008!![/dramatic echo]

Right now Ms. Gorelick is merely being rumored to be Obama's Attorney General, so there won't be any "How dare Obama..." here, yet. But apparently the rumors are loud enough for the editors of The NY Times to create this profile on her.

One huge reason that (among others that conservatives would hardly be grudging to trumpet) Gorelick's nomination might be a bad idea is that, if the reasons for the bailout are investigated (and honestly, isn't this something that both liberals and conservatives should be able to agree upon) high ranking officials for Fannie and Freddie should be potential subjects of subpoena.

Having one of those high ranking officials as the Attorney General, with all the conflict of interest possibilities, would be an intolerable situation.

It would be similar to Bush in 2004 nominating a former high ranking Enron executive to be Treasury Secretary.

Obama has the right to choose pretty much whomever he wants to be in his cabinet. Elections matter. But Senators have the constitutional right to "advise and consent." Now, I would not encourage Senate Republicans to filibuster or anything else drastic, but they are well within their rights to ask questions.

Very pointed questions. Questions about her experience at Fannie Mae. Questions about conflict of interest. Questions about decisions she made, and the compensation and arguably excessive bonuses she received. Questions that could be awkward for the Attorney General nominee and the Obama Administration. Questions that may cause the public that just elected Obama to the White House to pay attention and start asking their own awkward questions.

Questions about prominent Democrats who were running Freddie and Fannie in the immediate years before the economic bailout.

The Obama Administration may want to choose its early battles wisely.

HT: Instapundit

Shallow Soil in Seattle

2008-11-07T11:21:00.006-05:00

From the Seattle P-I:

Barack Obama's presidential win held a poignant significance for liberal Seattleites: This is their America, too.

The feeling was evident in jubilant partying in the streets, in quiet moments of reflection and in blossoms of red, white and blue.

With newfound patriotism, Seattleites want to wave the flag, hang it from their homes and stick it on their cars.

"The thing that's kind of astounding to me is I never ever would have cared to own a flag," said Rosemary Garner, 42. "This is the first day in my life I actually feel this funny sense of pride about my country. It's a very foreign feeling, but it's a good one."

Go and read the whole article, and get a true sampling of the proud childishness of some of these folks. I admit that I'm a bit disappointed in the election results and such, and I think the wrong decision was made, but during the next four or eight years, I will still be proud to be an American.

These folks admit that if the roles were reversed, they could not say the same.

How many American liberals are the sort of liberals to be so fickle in their love of America that it depends solely on whether their guy wins or loses the election?

*****

This reminds me of the parable of the sower from the Gospels. (Matthew 13, vs. 1-9)

1That same day Jesus went out of the house and sat by the lake. 2Such large crowds gathered around him that he got into a boat and sat in it, while all the people stood on the shore. 3Then he told them many things in parables, saying: "A farmer went out to sow his seed. 4As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. 5Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. 6But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. 7Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. 8Still other seed fell on good soil, where it produced a crop—a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown. 9He who has ears, let him hear."

In this passage Jesus is talking about His Word, but there is a striking similarity with what He says here, and these new patriots waving their flags.

Their love of country is like the seeds among the rocky soil. Quick to sprout, yet hopelessly shallow, and bound to whither at the first appearance of adversity.

Such is not what has made our country strong.

My Vote is Cast

2008-11-04T08:59:00.002-05:00

Just got back from casting my ballot. I am not wearing an I Vote sticker. They didn't have any, which really disappointed me. I wanted my sticker.

The line was nonexistent, and after walking into the church gymnasium was able to orient myself quickly where I needed to sign in, and given my paper ballot to fill out.

Odd, because I've used out these scan-type sheets many times before, but I was nervous as I filled in the circles by first McCain/Palin (enthusiastically) then Mitch McConnell (out of good Republican duty) then Anne Northup (ehh, why not, but to be honest Yarmuth hasn't done a bad job despite his ideology.)

I skipped some of the down ticket races because worse than non-voting is making an ignorant vote where I don't know anything about the candidates.

Then I voted against a candidate for judge, Katie King. For those living in Louisville reading this, you've probably heard the reasons why. But to be charitable, she is, among other things, just too young and not ready.

And funny enough, I got all warm and fuzzy leaving the polling place. I just cast a ballot for the President of the United States. I exercised my right as a citizen to do so.

I am lucky to have that opportunity.

PS: If McCain pulls it out... great. Time to party. But I will not boast or rub it in.

If not... well, congrats to all those Obama supporters out there reading this who, despite our differences, have kept it civil. Have a drink on me.

On Obama's Half Hour Tonight

2008-10-29T12:49:00.007-04:00

This grandiose manuever of Sen. Obama, buying a half hour on the national networks, is only possible because Obama doesn't keep his promises.

He promised to stay within the campaign finance system. He didn't. He broke his promise, and all those extra funds he has received allows him to purchase this gambit. That should be John McCain's only rebuttal: Obama cannot be trusted to keep his word.

And to all those liberals out there reading this who may think I'm wrong, let me ask you something.

How's that FISA vote treating you? He slid that cold blade right between the ribs, slow and deep, didn't he? Have you pulled that knife out of your back yet?

PS: And seriously, don't you think it's gonna annoy people who just want to watch the World Series?

Update: Forget the postscript, the game was not delayed for the Obama telecast. I heard wrong, my apologies for getting that fact wrong.

Breaking Concrete, Amateur Theology

2008-10-27T20:56:00.008-04:00

I went to visit my grandfather last week, and when I arrived he handed me a sledgehammer.

I'm not kidding. The 91-year old wanted to run a pipe under the sidewalk, and was going to tear up the sidewalk himself to get it done. I had no idea of his plans, and it was merely serendipity (for him) that I decided to show up that day to visit.

That old man was going to do it himself.

91-years old.

So with sledgehammer, regular hammer, and chisel, I tore rock and concrete apart for a good three hours. Having never demolished a chunk of sidewalk, it took me a while to figure out that the best way to do it was to simply take the sledgehammer with two hands, get the momentum going, and smash the ever loving dog poop out of the concrete with blow after blow after blow, and then to take the hammer and chisel to the formed fissures and wedge out the chunks.

Though I was pretty sore the next day, I have to admit it was kinda fun. It was like I was three and smashing Hot Wheels into wrecks on mom's hardwood floor again. Smash! Smash! Crash! Crash! Break! Break! Yeah!

Towards the end of the chore, sweating and leaning on the spade I was using to pry the chunks out, I was catching my breath and laughing with my grandpa.

He was thanking me for the job done, and I told him, "Don't worry, when I'm 91, I'll be making my grandkids break stuff for me. And if they complain, I'll tell them that my grandfather made me do the same thing."

He replied, "You stop working, you die."

As I finished up the job of smashing concrete and clearing out rock, I thought about those words, and why my grandpa would say them. Grandpa is a good Baptist, was a deacon in the church for many years. The protestant work ethic flows through his blood. He will be doing something productive right till the very end.

And that reply of his crystallized some hazy disparate thoughts floating through my head.

I believe God does put us here to work. It's one of our purposes. Not our only one, but definitely one of them. Can't really put my finger exactly why, but it does feel right, and with religion and dealing with God, feel isn't always a bad thing. For example, we feel guilty when we do wrong. Rationally, it may be hard to place the finger on why we do, but it's there regardless.

I try not to get too theological here at Digital Nicotine, so please excuse me for my amateur seminary soap box and any doctrinal fuzziness I may be indulging.

But work is good. God likes it when we work to get by and earn our living. He does like our sweat, literal or metaphorical. That feels right. If fortunate enough to live to 91, I'll be working, or at least bossing my grandson around as he works.

There's a lot of truth to what grandpa said. Once you stop working, you die.

Four Years of This?

2008-10-16T22:19:00.002-04:00

"UPDATE: It did not even occur to me, until a poster below accused me of being racist, that anyone would think my invoking of the line "Check yourself before you wreck yourself" had anything to do with Obama's race.

It does not.

It has to do with my frequent use of silly pop culture references, and the fact that I am a big fan of Ice Cube."

That is Jack Tapper over at ABCNews.com, after he gets accused of racism for daring to write something mildly critical of the Obama campaign. His criticism was that it is too early for Obama supporters to think the election is in the bag.

But it is apparently never too early for Obama supporters to use charges of racism to silence their critics.

HT: Slublog at AoS

This is Frustrating

2008-10-16T15:45:00.004-04:00

You know that whole claim about McCain supporters getting hateful, with a guy yelling "Kill him!" with him meaning Barack Obama?

It's horse manure.

Says who? The Secret Service, the professionals paid to investigate with the thoroughness of a colonoscopy anybody who makes a threat on the life of a President or Presidential candidate.

Only one person, the reporter for the Scranton TimesLeader who originally wrote the story, claims to have heard it. Not one other witness has corroborated the reporter's story, including the many members of law enforcement who were present at this rally as well. Over twenty were interviewed. Not one single corroboration.

And the entire McCain campaign, and its many supporters, are gleefully slandered for it.

Keith Olbermann devoted one of his histrionic Special Comments on this. Although, it should always be remembered, that in Mr. Olbermann's case, special is best understood being used as the common euphemism for retarded.

PS: And no, I'm not linking that schmuck.

I Blame Jefferson

2008-10-14T23:35:00.007-04:00

From McClatchy:

Headline: Alaska glaciers grew this year, thanks to colder weather

Two hundred years of glacial shrinkage in Alaska, and then came the winter and summer of 2007-2008.

Unusually large amounts of winter snow were followed by unusually chill temperatures in June, July and August.

"In mid-June, I was surprised to see snow still at sea level in Prince William Sound," said U.S. Geological Survey glaciologist Bruce Molnia. "On the Juneau Icefield, there was still 20 feet of new snow on the surface of the Taku Glacier in late July. At Bering Glacier, a landslide I am studying, located at about 1,500 feet elevation, did not become snow free until early August.

If, as according to this story, these glaciers have been shrinking since 1808, then we need to place the blame for it where it squarely belongs: On the reckless environmental policy of the Jefferson Administration. All that unregulated milling and blacksmithing released too terribly much carbon into our atmosphere. This never would have happened had Adams been elected to a second term.

Oops, Obama Accidently Told the Truth

2008-10-14T02:21:00.005-04:00

Barack Obama, talking to an investment lawyer, no scratch that, a plumber:

"It's not that I want to punish your success. I just want to make sure that everybody who is behind you, that they've got a chance for success too. My attitude is that if the economy's good for folks from the bottom up, it's gonna be good for everybody ... I think when you spread the wealth around, it's good for everybody."

Spread the wealth around? By government policy? That is socialism.

I work for a small business. It's not exactly mom and pop, but we have only 11 stores total, which isn't exactly huge either.

The more money the government takes via taxes from my boss -- the man who literally signs my paychecks -- the less money he has to invest in the company, and the less money he has to pay me.

Homer Simpson Isn't the Only Cartoon Supporting Obama

2008-10-10T22:08:00.004-04:00

According to this leaked Simpson clip, Homer Simpson is going to vote Obama. Sounds about right. I mean, Homer isn't the brightest of bulbs. That said, it makes you wonder, what other cartoon characters might be pulling the switch for Obama this year?

Papa Smurf: Let's think about the Smurf form of government. Each smurf has their respective position in a highly organized society. Handy Smurf designs and builds. Hefty Smurf is the muscle. Farmer Smurf farms. Tailor Smurf tailors. Baker Smurf bakes. And Papa Smurf is their benevolent leader. There is no member higher than the yeoman level, and they're always chased by Gargamel (aka "evil capitalist"), who wants to take advantage of them to turn them into gold. Papa Smurf is a pinko, and even wears a red hat. Papa Smurf: Obama

Richie Rich: Now you may think that being rich and all, that Mr. Rich would be all about the Republicans. But you'd be only half right. If kinda Rich, it would be McCain in a heart beat. But no, Richie Rick isn't kinda rich. He's ridiculous rich. Like Warren Buffet rich. Or George Soros rich. Or twenty-nine year old Silicon Valley billionaire rich. He's ultra super-fab rich. Richie Rich: Obama

Fat Albert: Do I really need to go in depth on this? Fat Albert: Barack Obama

Casper the Friendly Ghost: Casper has been dead for how long? You know that ACORN has him registered to vote, so we know that "Casper the Friendly Ghost," (wink wink) along with a whole bunch of other dead folks, will vote Obama, whether or not that is how they would vote if actually alive. "Casper the Friendly Ghost:" Obama

Cobra Commander: Being on the record to meet with any leader with no preconditions? Cobra Commander: Obama

Snagglepuss: Gay marriage is much more likely under a Democratic administraion than a Republican one. Snagglepuss: Obama

Captian Planet: Not Obama. This guy's Green Party all the way. Captian Planet: Cynthia McKinney.

The New Party? A New Ballgame?

2008-10-08T22:56:00.011-04:00

Is The New Party going to be the political buzz word a week from now?

In the mid-nineties, evidence suggests that Barack Obama openly belonged to a socialist third party called The New Party. Obama has acknowledged that he has received endorsements from this now defunct political party, but has categorically denied he was a member.

If PoliticallyDrunk, who did the research, is correct, then Obama lied.

If Sen. Obama is lying about this membership, we need to know why. He may be our next President.

There is nothing illegal or automatically disqualifying about belonging to a socialist party. Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont is a proud socialist. But Sen. Sanders sells himself as someone influenced by socialist ideas. Sen. Obama has been playing the economic moderate.

Caveat: The evidence look intriguing, but like all Internet stories, I'm passing this on as a strong lead, something to keep an eye on, but not gospel. This needs follow up. More digging. It shouldn't be allowed to float as a damning rumor. It needs confirmation or rejection.

The media must investigate this. If the NY Times, the ahem, "paper of record," can rashly and falsely print a front page story claiming that Gov. Palin belonged to a controversial third party, maybe they can spare an intern or two currently trolling the dumpsters and bars of Anchorage to follow up on a lead about Obama's membership to a controversial third party.

I think that if not forced, the mainstream media will at most only cast a cursory glance. Forged National Guard documents on 60 Mintutes II make me cynical like that.

Obama is in many ways an unknown quantity. His life is not the open public record like Sen. McCain's is. Voters have a right to know as much about his public life as possible. This needs to be objectively confirmed or objectively debunked quickly. To me, the evidence looks pretty strong at the links I provide on this post, but you should further check out the evidence yourself.

Post Debate Commentary

2008-10-07T23:22:00.005-04:00

Maybe this wasn't a big ninety minutes of nothing, but it seemed like it. I don't really blame the two candidates, but the format and questions. No real back and forth for the most part between McCain and Obama. The questions were from "real people" but they might as well have been from members of the media, in that they rather generically covered the issues you would expect them to cover.

Tie goes to Obama, and this was a tie. In fact, if this were a football game, the score would be 3-3. A soccer match and the score would be double nil.

I'm a bit of a political junkie, and I found myself wandering off during this. I don't know what those watching who maybe haven't been following this race as much thought of it, and maybe that's a perspective I no longer possess, but not one bit of momentum was changed.

What this means is that Obama still has a decent though not insurmountable lead on McCain, and that while McCain didn't catch up tonight, neither did Obama seal the deal. Yet the calender is now Obama's ally, and he is one day closer to being elected at this point.

Interesting Rebuttal

2008-10-06T12:58:00.003-04:00

A good analogy:

This is rather like a person claiming that he had worked closely with Arnold Schwarzenegger for years, but had no idea that he was once a bodybuilder and movie actor.

Read it all. You are judged by the company you keep.

You Are Only As Good As Your Last Game

2008-10-03T00:12:00.005-04:00

The old sports metaphor is, "You are only as good as your last game."

Governor Palin was damn good. There may be some debate among those who want to debate such things about who scored a higher point tally, but only those hopelessly rooting against Gov. Palin could say that she didn't hold her own against a Senator with over thirty years experience after this night's performance.

In that regard, and when you consider the stadards that many were creating for Palin for the past few weeks, only to try to build her up that last 24 hours, she clearly won. Simply because she didn't fall on her face. But she did way much better than even that. Therefore, I would like to thank those who, out of sheer hate, jealousy, and leftist condescension, couldn't hold themselves to mere legitimate criticism of the vice-presidential nominee, but had to over-indulge in the Palin-hate and elitism you are famous for.

No matter how the vote count actually turns out November 4th, you have at least made this night a damn fine one.

You're welcome, sincerely, Lee from Digital Nicotine.

Such a Waste

2008-10-02T11:34:00.003-04:00

Whoever came up with the idea of self-immolation as a form of political protest deserves to have their grave spit on. And I don't care if it was some really noble, peace-loving, orange-clad Buddhist monk all the hipsters can get into.

It isn't noble. It isn't an expression of desperation by the oppressed. It's just stupid. A stupid waste.

Tom, You Social Misfit You

2008-10-02T11:04:00.004-04:00

Tom got busted. So to mark this moment.

PS: I love that opening riff. After the election, I promise less politics, more metal.

Word's Getting Out

2008-10-02T10:27:00.004-04:00

The Wall Street Journal names names and publishes quotes concerning the leadup to the housing bailout. You should read the whole piece, but an example:

~ Rep. Frank [Sept. 25, 2003]: I do think I do not want the same kind of focus on safety and soundness that we have in OCC [Office of the Comptroller of the Currency] and OTS [Office of Thrift Supervision]. I want to roll the dice a little bit more in this situation towards subsidized housing. . . .

As the news is now showing, the dice were rolled. They came up snake-eyes.

Update: Just for the record... The time stamp on this post using Rep. Frank's (D) quote is 10:27 am, while Glenn (Instapundit) Reynold's is 10:36 am. Yeah, we see who really drives the right-wing blogosphere now, don't we?

Clips from a Hearing on Freddie and Fannie, Four Years Before the Implosion

2008-09-30T04:23:00.002-04:00

Watch this video from a Congressional hearing from 2004 (yes it's mostly from C-Span, but it's only eight minutes) and watch after Democrat after Democrat, including the now ubiquitous Barney Frank, repeatedly deny that there is any sort of problem with Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, and completely and rudely berate the regulator who was trying to do his job by alerting Congress to the potential of a brewing breakdown.

Absolutely galling. Now consider these quotes from a NY Times article from 2003 when the Bush Administration proposed, but unfortunately couldn't get passed, tighter regulations for Freddie and Fannie.

"These two entities -- Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac -- are not facing any kind of financial crisis," said Representative Barney Frank of Massachusetts, the ranking Democrat on the Financial Services Committee. "The more people exaggerate these problems, the more pressure there is on these companies, the less we will see in terms of affordable housing."

Representative Melvin L. Watt, Democrat of North Carolina, agreed.

"I don't see much other than a shell game going on here, moving something from one agency to another and in the process weakening the bargaining power of poorer families and their ability to get affordable housing," Mr. Watt said.

There were repeated warnings, not heeded but outright mocked by the same folks who are now braying the loudest. They are now trying to score political gain out of the destruction of the financial markets that they helped create.

Was The Fix In?

2008-09-29T22:30:00.004-04:00

“The speaker hasn’t told me yet. I do what I’m told.”

~ John Clyburn, Democratic whip, explaining yesterday that not only had he not been whipping up Democratic votes for the bailout vote that was today, but that Pelosi hadn't even thought to tell him to get on it.

You add that to a scorching if not insulting partisan speech just before a vote desperately needing bipartisan support on an issue where House Republicans are being asked to vote not just against their general philosophy, but for many their constituents back home, just before an election, and you begin to think...

Maybe the Democratic leadership didn't want this bailout to pass?

Recap:

~ 95 Dems voted against the bailout.
~ Clyburn, the Democratic whip, admitted he wasn't whipping.
~ Pelosi intentionally insults those whom common sense would say she should be cajoling.

Conclusion:

The fix was in. The Dem leadership was negotiating in bad faith. It was all a game.

Half a Debate

2008-09-27T01:42:00.003-04:00

I went to a wedding reception tonight, so to catch the Presidential debate between Senators Obama and McCain, I Tivo'd the debate.

So I'm watching it when I get home on the recorded programming on the local Fox affiliate, Fox-41 WDRB. Both candidates are landing points, and while I'm rooting McCain and therefore am biased when I say that I think him slightly ahead, I don't consider the debate game-changing. I do want to say though that McCain's fluency on the economic problems going on are comforting.

The candidates begin to discuss Pakistan, and then, the station switches, mid-answer of one of the Senators, to the local news, letting the audience know that if they want to continue the debate, they can follow it on another station.

Good to see the station's priorities in order there. The two candidates facing each other for President discussing the current economic turmoil and war on extremist Islam, and they decide that the local news can't wait an additional half hour or so. Horribly frustrating.

PS: Jim Lehrer was doing, as usual for him, an excellent job as moderator. From what I saw he played it straight down the middle and made sure the focus was on the candidates, and not him. That's all you can ask.

My Grandfather's Garage

2008-09-26T13:17:00.003-04:00

My maternal grandfather is a man who in his prime was one of those great men who could construct almost anything with his hands. He could pour cement. He could build furniture. He could reupholster chairs. He could tinker with small motors.

The house in which he still lives is a testament to this. Starting as a two bedroom ranch, he added a garage, then a breezeway between the garage and the house, then rooms above the garage for his growing family. The current house in which he lives is actually more than double in size from what it originally was, and until recently one not familiar with the previous dimensions of the house would be completely unable to tell that the house featured any annexes, so adept and expert was my grandfather in his construction and design.

But aging is cruel, and while my grandfather still has the urge to create, still at 91, not only is his ability to physically work limited, so is the sharpness of his decision making. I would not say that he suffers from age-related dementia. But that razor-like blade of his intelligence that so personified him has been dulled just enough that there is a now a bit of silliness to some of his current projects. The craftsmanship is not what it was. The final product not as finished. The concept, not quite clear.

Such as this past Wednesday helping him clean out his garage. If you were to gather all the materials and relics found among my grandfather’s attic, basement, and garage, you would have maybe enough to create a small museum to the common technologies and fashions of the twentieth century, especially those years post WWII to 1980.

Wednesday, being off from work, I told my grandfather I would be over to help cut down and clear out some downed branches and trees from the windstorm we experienced in the area Sunday before last. When I arrived, he instead wanted help cleaning out the garage. The expression Hercules had on his face when told about the Augean stables may have been similar to the expression I had when told about the garage.

I do exaggerate, but there’s some truth as well.

Chairs upon chairs stacked next to scrap pieces of vinyl siding next to scrap pieces of plumbing next to scrap pieces of plywood next to bandsaws next to drill bits next to an old wringer from the 1920s (?) next to rusted cans of paint next to rusted cans of wood stain next to family reunion signs next to large metal pails next to a coffee table leaned against the wall next to two milk crates full of ceramic tile next to linoleum floor covering next to…

And, to my complete and utter frustration, my grandfather would not throw any of it away. Among the old furniture there were some real treasures, as well as other pieces quite likely to sell quickly at a peddler’s mart or antique mall. But most were beat up pieces of junk deserving to be thrown in a small ditch for a good burning. Yet none was to be thrown away, only rearranged, for my grandfather was convinced that it could be refurnished in a future project. Twenty years ago, he would have known better.

The scraps of building material scattered and piled all over the garage, the same thing. They could be handy to have around for some undetermined future project. It was to be stacked into the corner or laid down conveniently in a pile. And as my grandfather now softly mumbles his speech with age, and could not precisely describe what he wanted to do with the piles of his collection, I found myself in an absurdity of simply rearranging piles of (mostly) junk just for the sake of rearranging it.

This was not how I wanted to spend my day off. Sawing downed branches and clearing brush out in the sunny air would have been productive. Randomly moving piles of junk in a dusky garage wasn’t. I was getting frustrated. But you bite your tongue concerning your nonagenarian grandfather.

I think after a few hours of this even he realized the futility of the chore, and called it a day. I was relieved to be honest, but there is a bit of sadness.

I have a nightstand my grandfather created back in The Great Depression. He gave it to me when I moved into my first apartment after college. It is simple, sturdy, and quietly elegant -- the work of a future craftsman. I had no idea it was the first piece of furniture he created until after I accepted it, only then did he tell me.

Wednesday after the garage he showed me a copy of the death certificate of his brother, Willard Merlin Barnes, which he had rediscovered recently, issued by the US Navy. His brother Willard was a seaman on the USS Indianapolis.

Yes, that USS Indianapolis. The one that transported the atomic bomb. The one that sank in those last closing days of the Pacific Theater.

Just picture my grandfather, a 91 year-old man, looking at the framed death certificate of his older brother who died a young one, showing it to one of his ten grandchildren (he has eight great grandchildren as well), not willing to throw away his old tools to construct with, his old materials to create with, those beat up rocking chairs to re-stain, those faded cushions to reupholster. Picture that grandson, whom earlier he had been frustrating to no end by that unwillingness, quietly standing there, almost a bit wonderous, looking and touching for the first time something physical that had previously only been abstract, realizing the faded but still very present pain of the early death of my grandfather's brother.

I don't believe it is just the past, a lifetime of possessions taking over ninety years to accumulate, that my grandfather has piled in his garage, basement, and attic. It is the prospect of future projects that he stores.

To take those projects away, to take those building materials, even the ones in his old age that he is incapable of recognizing as useless, is to take from him not his past, but the utility and usefulness of his future.

That old man, like all of us to a degree, but him especially, was made to create, and still has more in his lifetime to do.

Only an ungrateful grandson could imply to him otherwise.

Well, At Least They've Got Their Priorities in Order

2008-09-26T10:28:00.003-04:00

This is apparently the very last press release that Washington Mutual sent out before going belly up earlier today.

SEATTLE, WA (September 24, 2008) – Washington Mutual, Inc. (NYSE:WM), one of the nation’s leading banks for consumers and small businesses, has once again been recognized as a top employer by Hispanic Business magazine and the Human Rights Campaign.

Hispanic Business magazine recently ranked WaMu sixth in its annual Diversity Elite list, which names the top 60 companies for Hispanics. The company was honored specifically for its efforts to recruit Hispanic employees, reach out to Hispanic consumers and support Hispanic communities and organizations.

Don't think that WaMu is anymore a top ten company for Hispanics... or Whites, or African-Americans, or gay biracial post-op transsexuals, or anybody else for that matter.

Don't get me wrong, diversity is nice and all, but remaining solvent is a bit more important. I mean, yes they're out of business because they made absolutely horrible business decisions, but they were diverse damnit.

But if you want to look on the bright side, everybody else on the Diversity Elite list gets to bump up a spot now.

HT: NRO

Harry Reid, Not a Grownup

2008-09-24T19:48:00.002-04:00

Yesterday, Harry Reid said this:

“We need, now, the Republicans to start producing some votes for us. We need the Republican nominee for president to let us know where he stands and what we should do.”

So John McCain temporarily suspends his campaign to go back to Washington to work on the negotiations for the bailout.

So, today, Harry Reid says this:

"But it would not be helpful at this time to have them [Sens. McCain and Obama] come back during these negotiations and risk injecting presidential politics into this process or distract important talks about the future of our nation’s economy."

Yesterday, John, we need you. Today, John, stay away.

Harry Reid, worst Senate Majority Leader, evah!!

Calling All Grownups

2008-09-22T21:21:00.006-04:00

I'll be honest that the answer to what is going on over at Wall Street is, to borrow an unfortunate phrase, above my pay grade. However, I know that whatever is done, I want it to be pragmatic and as painless as possible. I can handle a bad situation, if it means that we avoid a cataclysmic one. With that in mind I give you this snippet from Dean Barnett over at the Weekly Standard.

"Just as there are Republicans crassly calculating how they can leverage the current situation to their political advantage, there are obviously Democrats doing the same (although I’m not aware of any who have been so silly as to say so publicly). Fortunately, the grown-ups in both parties have controlled the situation. If the grown-ups decide this situation has become a political opportunity rather than a legitimate national emergency, we’ll all have a problem - “problem” here being a mild euphemism for an economic disaster.

[snip]

... [A]nyone who comes to the party without a first priority of staving off panic and saving the credit markets should be turned away at the door."

Yes, read the whole thing.

The Left's Secret Plan to Win This Election. Plus, a Star Wars Reference

2008-09-19T15:11:00.006-04:00

I believe that the left is going to intentionally make themselves so unbearably shrill, hateful, and detestable, that people will not vote McCain simply because they don't want to listen to four more years of unhinged hatefulness.

Like this. (Warning on the language)

"Fine, we give up. Obama in '08. Just please... make... it... stop. We're sick of the constant hatred."

Can any liberals please come up with conservatives publicly and proudly spewing such hatred towards Obama? And revelling in that hate? And of course, the true measure of this clip isn't what Bernhard says, but the joy the crowd takes in it.

And per this link, Bernhard also made what was apparently a very funny joke about Palin getting gang raped. Feminist outrage in five... four... oh, never mind.

I know that last Star Wars movie was supposed to be some sort of damning allegory about the Bush presidency, but how can you now look at this clip and not come to the conclusion that it is actually many on the left who are rushing to embrace The Dark Side.

If this isn't typical of the American Left, it is at least typical of the direction in which it is heading.

All Those Pushing for Canadian-Style Health Care, Heads Up

2008-09-18T23:04:00.002-04:00

This is exquisitely funny. From a forum featuring liberal economist and NY Times columnist Paul Krugman.

*****

PAUL KRUGMAN:
Actually, can I just — I wanted to ask a question. And—

JOHN DONVAN:
Please—please do—

PAUL KRUGMAN:
—and I wanted to ask, actually two questions, to the audience. First, how many Canadians, would Canadians in the room please raise your hands. [ONE PERSON APPLAUDS, LAUGHTER]

JOHN DONVAN:
We have about seven hands going up—

PAUL KRUGMAN:
Okay, not as many as I thought. Okay, of those of you who are not on the panel who are Canadians, how many of you think you have a terrible health care system. [PAUSE] One, two—

JOHN DONVAN:
We see—almost all of the same hands going up. [LAUGHTER]

PAUL KRUGMAN:
Bad move on my part. [APPLAUSE]

*****

You know, we could learn from Canada's mistakes... without necessarily repeating them.

Today's Winner of the Internet

2008-09-14T20:12:00.003-04:00

"A tangle of lips and tongues and hands, all groping and exploring"? From the foreign desk of The New York Times? I'll grant that this is an important story -- how could a story about the sexual mores of Chilean teenagers not be? -- but if you're going to publish stories about an outbreak of horniness in Latin America, at least consult Penthouse on how to make the writing non-humiliatingly bad.

~ Jeffrey Goldberg

Yes, it was actually posted yesterday, but it's too good not to mention.

The Face of Liberalism

2008-09-14T15:13:00.007-04:00

This link happens to be from The NY Post, but there are many other sources out there as well on this.

Controversial celebrity photographer Jill Greenberg, a self-professed "hard-core Dem," deliberately took a series of unflattering shots of Republican nominee John McCain for the current cover of The Atlantic - and then bragged about it on a blog.

[snip]

Greenberg also crowed that she had tricked McCain into standing over a strobe light placed on the floor - turning the septuagenarian's face into a horror show of shadows.

Asking McCain to "please come over here" for a final shot, Greenberg pretended to be using a standard modeling light.

The resulting photos depict McCain as devilish, with bulging brows and washed-out skin.

"He had no idea he was being lit from below," Greenberg said, adding that none of his entourage picked up on the light switch either. "I guess they're not very sophisticated," she said.

Sophisticated, Ms. Greenberg? You lied to your subject, and to the publication that hired you. The Atlantic now has an embarrasement over you, could potentially lose subscriptions from disgruntled subscribers, and yet you blame them for hiring you, and you denigrate the McCain folks as unsophisticated because they are not familiar with the technical aspects of professional photography.

Because of you Ms. Greenberg, political campaigns on both sides of the aisle may now begin to inquire about the political leanings of those entrusted to do professional photography for them to avoid a situation like this in the future. How will that help your fellow photographers?

Ms. Greenberg, I hope your dentist isn't a Republican. Same with your tax attorney. Or your electrician. Heaven help you if the professionals that you hire don't treat their clients like you treat yours.

Didn't know that your dentist gave you an extra bridge and three root canals that you really didn't need? Your fault for hiring him. Should have seen that Bush/Cheney sticker on his car in the parking lot. Guess you're not that sophisticated.

Truce

2008-09-11T09:29:00.002-04:00

No political posts today. Out of respect. Tomorrow, the partisan 'fun' resumes.

Let the Conspiracy Theories Begin

2008-09-10T23:27:00.004-04:00

Looks like the campaign offices of Rep. John Yarmuth (D) were burglarized last night.

LOUISVILLE, KY (WAVE) - Right in the thick of the heated political season, Congressman John Yarmuth's campaign office has been the victim of some crafty crooks.

Campaign officials believe the office in the 900 block of E. Market Street was broken in to sometime overnight Tuesday or early Wednesday morning.

Of course this bring up the obvious question: What does Anne Northup know, and when did she know it?

For those not in the... well... know, Northup is the Republican who lost her seat to Yarmuth last election, and is trying to win it back this year. Now, I do know that dirty politics do still exist, but I'm rather skeptical that this is the current situation. Why pursue such a high risk maneuver like a Watergate-esque break-in for such a low-level seat of power, relatively speaking?

I'm guessing just a couple of hoods. But who knows? The folks who dig conspiracies will be all over this one.

Bottoms Up On a Recommended Read

2008-09-10T22:23:00.008-04:00

Of course as college football starts everybody follows not only their own team, but they keep an eye out on the traditional powers vying for national and conference titles like Ohio State, Southern Cal, Georgia, and Oklahoma, and the studs on those powerhouses competing for Heisman recognition.

But one thing I look forward to as college football approaches is ESPN's Bottom 10, where they sarcastically celebrate the inept of Division 1A football. (I refuse to call is the FBS.)

Yes, the list is populated with the dregs such as Florida International, Utah St., and UL-U-Pick em', but there is a nice wicked joy to it all when a big dog like Syracuse or Arkansas makes the list for blessed incompetence. And last year, when folks like Notre Dame and Michigan screwed up big time and wound up there -- hello, Appalachian State! -- that was pure bliss.

There is also a tender flip side to that coin in that bit of joy present when a perennial resident, like The Mean Green of North Texas, wins a game and exits the list of shame.

Go check it out.

PS: I have not in any way been compensated by ESPN.com for this post, or by their corporate bosses at Big Mouse. If you are with Big Mouse and want to give me money or other gifts, please leave me a comment and contact info, and I will quickly get in touch.

On 'Swinegate'

2008-09-10T00:24:00.010-04:00

I am not a fan of harping on gaffes. They are too cheap, too easy, and there is no real intellectualism involved in beating your opponent over the head with them. (Not that I'm all that academic, but I do try to set standards.) I do not believe that Obama counts 57 states in the union, nor do I believe that McCain does not know the difference between Shiite or Sunni.

That said, when I first heard about this, my jaw dropped.

I was honestly stunned.

As someone who is with enthusiasm voting for the GOP ticket, let me say that the dropping of the jaw was out of disbelief because, though I am not one who would seriously consider voting for Obama, this seems out of character for the man.

But the crowd, listen to their laughter. They caught immediately the implication of what Obama said. How could Obama not catch how these words would be taken? I know that I have some partisan tendencies, but at the same time, I am trying to give the senator the benefit of the doubt, and while it is possible to believe Obama merely used a colloquialism without thinking things through on how his words might be interpreted, it is difficult.

And you may or may not believe me, but I am honestly trying to be fair on this.

There are two explanations here:

Explanation 1: Sen. Obama, a man highly regarded by friend and foe alike for his eloquence, off the cuff said something so stupid that it instantly compares unfavorably (for Obama) with Trent Lott's Strom Thurman birthday speech, George Allen's macacca moment, and John Kerry's "for it before I was against it" gaffe.

His enemies will use this against him, no matter his true intention, but worse yet, the common independent man cannot truly be faulted if they disbelieve Obama's explanation.

Unfortunately, for Sen. Obama, Explanation 1 is actually the better situation of the two.

Explanation 2: The Democratic nominee for President intentionally called the first female Republican nominee for Vice-President a pig.

If true, I would not know what to say.

Update: Let me also add, that if Obama did merely have a gaffe, I hope that after the 48 to 72 hours the senator will need to fully remove his foot from his mouth, people will move on and real issues will be discussed.

Of course the same people who for the past year have been searching for super secret racist dog whistles, racial subcontexts, and phallic imagery (cough Bob Herbert cough) will be perfectly cool with ignoring the glaring possibility that something less than benign was meant by Sen. Obama, and will be glad to quickly move on. But this says less about the presidential race, or me personally, and all about them.

So unless Obama is a true dummy, and like Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men gets mad, comes on out and actually says, "Yes I did it, what 'cha gonna do?" give the senator his lumps for the rest of the week, and then move on.

The Blogfather Beats Me to a Post I Was Thinking of Making

2008-09-08T23:42:00.005-04:00

From Insty:

My email is full of stuff (if I missed your email, sorry -- I've been flooded even by my usual drinking-from-a-firehose standards), Memeorandum is overrun with items, and the enthusiasm of the G.O.P. grassroots is at levels that would have seemed impossible just a couple of weeks ago.

But I think that Republicans should be careful about launching a cult of Sarah Palin. She's the V.P. pick, not the head of the ticket. She's still a relative newcomer to national politics. She's virtually sure to commit at least one major mistake between now and November. And -- yes, I know I said this before -- she's the V.P. pick, not the head of the ticket.

Dang good point. Democrats out of condenscention have been doing nothing but set a bar that is so incredibly low that it would be near impossible for Gov. Palin not to clear it. Yet, it would be strategically stupid for Republicans to now set one so incredibly high that Daniel Webster or Henry Clay, let alone Sarah Palin, could be reasonably expected to clear it.

Additionally, the reason I do consider myself a conservative is because I am not one to be easily swept away by my emotions. I understand that the tendency and temptation is there, as for any mortal being. I also understand that this is what has driven many an Obama supporter. But I do not want to be the right-wing doppleganger of an Obamabot... a Palinbot? Or whatever term you may choose to coin.

Once there is recognition, then there is a natural guard again falling in that trap. That's why I'm posting this. As a friendly warning for like-minded allies.

Does This Make Palin Grendel, or Grendel's Mother?

2008-09-07T10:59:00.003-04:00

From the Guardian (of all places):

For once, the postmodern theories so many of them were taught at university are a help to the rest of us. As a Christian, conservative anti-abortionist who proved her support for the Iraq War by sending her son to fight in it, Sarah Palin was 'the other' - the threatening alien presence they defined themselves against. They might have soberly examined her reputation as an opponent of political corruption to see if she was truly the reformer she claimed to be. They might have gently mocked her idiotic creationism, while carefully avoiding all discussion of the racist conspiracy theories of Barack Obama's church.

But instead of following a measured strategy, they went berserk.

Giggle. Palin as... The Other. I love that.

HT: Ace

Anatomy of a Smear, and a Post-Script to an Earlier Post

2008-09-06T22:47:00.005-04:00

From the Weekly Standard post titled, Anatomy of a Smear, concerning an affair that wasn't:

Thus, the method of the smear mechanism reveals itself – print a lot of speculative crap, all while maintaining a malign indifference as to whether or not you can prove said speculative crap. Actually nailing down a story before running it? That’s so 20th century, at least in the virtual pages of the Atlantic. Doing actual reporting to confirm life-damaging rumors before circulating them? Such quotidian tasks are obviously beneath an Atlantic blogger’s pay grade.

And now for a post-script from a recent post on a different smear, from the same source, following the same modus operandi:

If all this slander (and that's what it really is, Andrew Sullivan, couching it in a question is only cowardice) gets [Palin] a larger audience, she has the potential to impress a larger chunk of the voting American public.

May she take advantage.

Man it feels good to be so darn right.

An Experiment Not to be Tried Again

2008-09-06T22:21:00.002-04:00

Last night, with no beer in the fridge to sip on while perusing these wide wide Internet highways, I concocted a make-do mixed drink.

Bacardi, and Welch's Grape Soda.

I love grape soda, and rum is okay, though not my favorite. So I figured, "Hey, why not?"

Answer: Not. A very definitive not.

RNC: Nights Two and Three

2008-09-05T12:32:00.003-04:00

Night Two:

Enough red meat to bury someone in hamburger. Guiliani had a heck of a speech that nobody remembers because of the anticipation for Palin, and the (overused baseball metaphor alert) homerun she hit. That's the danger of setting such low expectations. But everybody's gone over this so on to last night, and McCain's speech.

Night Three:

A good speech from McCain. Odd for a nomination speech, in that in front of all those party activists, he really at times took the GOP to task.

I'm not complaining.

McCain/Palin isn't the Republican ticket. It's the BullMoose ticket. It is going to be about strong national security and Washington reform. The reform prong of the campaign explains in hindsight why the Palin pick is not as (overused baseball metaphor alert) out of left field as initially thought. She's fought the Republican power establishment in her home state, winning more battles than she lost.

Update: A good synopsis of those Alaskan battles.

First Real Night of the RNC

2008-09-03T09:19:00.006-04:00

Some quick observations:

~ Watched it on PBS. Don't have cable. Lehrer doesn't talk during speeches.

~ Did not realize that none of the broadcast networks covered Fred Thompson's speech until afterwards, which is a shame because he gave the best one of the night.

~ Leiberman's was fairly middling to be honest; Zell Miller he is not. You would think that a Senator crossing over to the other side's convention would spark more energy. He made a play for independents and moderate Dems, but how successful he was I don't know. Though his presence alone does make a statement.

~ Doesn't really matter. Tonight with Palin and tomorrow with McCain are the two big nights anyway.

~ With this ugly media feeding frenzy going on, we are in the odd position of where the Vice-Presidential nominee's speech may be just as, if not more, important than the Presidential nominee's. McCain is a known quantity, Palin isn't. If all this slander (and that's what it really is, Andrew Sullivan, couching it in a question is only cowardice) gets her a larger audience, she has the potential to impress a larger chunk of the voting American public.

May she take advantage.

On Today. Which I Mostly Missed. Thankfully.

2008-09-01T21:41:00.005-04:00

With Labor day being a huge day for the company, and with the boss having me work the store by myself, I didn't have a chance to check the Internet at all today, as I was run ragged by customer after customer after customer.

It's not a bad thing though when you're paid commission, so I'm not complaining about that.

Towards the end however, I had about 20 minutes where I could scan what was going on in blog world.

Um...

Yeah.

I left one snarky reply below, not knowing how absurd things had gotten today. Then I kept on reading, briefly scanning various sites, nationally known and my own blogroll, both left and right.

I'm not going to wade into this slime. I don't need it. I don't want it. I don't even want to put on my waders so I can go and rebut it. And some of it does need a forceful rebuttal. But I don't want to cast blame, even on those who deserve it. I don't want to play politics. I don't even want to attempt sincere high-minded observations right now because I just don't want to get even of a hint of this stench on me.

I'm not even going to mention what 'it' is, or mention the names of the notable persons involved. But you all know what I'm talking about if you've been following the news today. Maybe after a couple of days I might be in a different mood and will want to give my $.02. Who knows?

But not now. I am, at the moment, simply put out and embarrassed even to be part of the game.

Once is a Fluke, Twice However...

2008-08-31T01:26:00.002-04:00

Just watch the two clips below. The first one is long, so catch between the 1:00 and 1:30 mark. The second clip is less than a minute, so catch the whole thing.

This shows pretty much the current state of the Democratic party and the left in general -- rooting on hurricanes for political gain.

Kinda confirms that all that Katrina talk from the left has always been nothing but simple politics the entire time. If it's bad for Republicans, why not cheer on a natural disaster?

That Did Not Take Long

2008-08-30T00:53:00.004-04:00

In my initial post about the selection of Palin, I made this comment:

"I can't wait for the latent misogyny of some on the left to come out in full force towards her between now and November."

It has already started. From a right wing source, and a snippet from a left wing one.

Well, that took—what?—an hour? Petulant just emailed me to say he heard someone on the Stephanie Miller Show calling Palin a "bimbo." (Presumably because she's a former beauty queen.) And I'm already reading indictments of "her" that include information like "her husband works for an oil company."

They're not happy with their fellow progressive men. (Snicker, snicker.)

I know I'm almost always right [/hubris] but it feels sooo good to have it proven sooo quickly.

Stay Classy Kos Kids

2008-08-29T20:44:00.004-04:00

From a diarist at Daily Kos:

"But it appears that Pallin's last child, a baby with Down's syndrome, may not be hers. It may be that of her teenage daughter."

I assume it will be deleted shortly. Can't let the public see the ugliness that is the Netroots.

I swear, with the out and out shrillness I've seen from a good chunk of the left today, I think McCain may have hit a homerun with this pick, and the left fears he may have as well.

Update: Speaking of those with mental handicaps, I just noticed the diarist can't even spell the nominee's name correctly. Pallin?

A Very Appropriate Feel Good Friday

2008-08-29T18:37:00.002-04:00

With the news coming out today concerning McCain's pick for Vice-President, I thought this selection appropriate. It involves both a Palin, and of course, the Great White North.

Palin is the Veep Nominee

2008-08-29T12:11:00.007-04:00

Some thoughts on McCain's pick of Gov. Sarah Palin of Alaska as his Vice-President nominee, in convenient bullet form.

~ The base is going to love it. Love, love, love it.

~ The main knock, and it is a legitimate one, is that two years ago, Gov. Palin was only a mayor of a town. Then again, two years ago, Barack Obama was only a state legislator, and Palin is running only for Veep, and not the actual Presidency.

~ This pick will not necessarily win over some of the PUMAs, but it does put them in play.

~ I can't wait for the latent misogyny of some on the left to come out in full force towards her between now and November.

Update: Two more points after watching her speech.

~ Charlie Gibson (I was watching ABC) made a good point. They are making a pitch for the working class, especially working class women. She comes from the working class, and she will be able to connect.

~ Both are so-called mavericks in their party. Palin made her name taking on the establishment of the Republican Party in Alaska, grown stagnant due to its one party rule up there. And McCain, well, we already know about how he has tweaked the national party.

Update II: Grudging respect from the left. Though it's not like they're gonna vote McCain/Palin in November.

An Interesting What If

2008-08-28T14:06:00.005-04:00

This man to the left is 50 years old. Or should be. No, he is 50 all right, but this should be what he looks like.

I think you know where I'm going with this. Click here for more.

HT: Hotair

The Problem With the Democratic Party in a Nutshell

2008-08-28T11:25:00.004-04:00

From NRO:

Maysoon Abdelhady says she is the perfect Democratic National Convention delegate.

“I was recruited because I’m a woman. I’m a Palestinian. I’m a Muslim. I’m disabled and, because I’m 30 and still not married, people think I’m gay.

“I told all that to the head of the New Jersey delegation but she said, ‘Excellent — you fill every quota we have!’”

Update/Correction: Per the first comment at this post, looks like the quote above was taken out of context, and was meant to be gently self-mocking. My bad, should have taken better care. Dang you, National Review!

On the Shenanigans Outside the Democratic Convention

2008-08-28T10:34:00.002-04:00

Looks like the folks who wanted to ReCreate '68 really haven't succeeded. All the reports I've read about the protests outside have been of a cursory manner. Those who wanted their voices heard responsibly seem to have been given their chance, and those who merely wanted to wear bandanas and break stuff haven't.

Good. That is how it should be.

Illegal Aliens: Doing the Union Manufacturing Labor That Americans Don't Want to Do?

2008-08-27T23:26:00.002-04:00

From MSNBC:

Friction between the union and immigrant workers, along with a tipoff at an electrical manufacturing plant, boiled over this week into the biggest workplace immigration raid in the nation's history.

When the first of the 595 suspected illegal immigrants was taken into custody Monday, some fellow workers broke into applause. A spokeswoman for U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement said the investigation started three years ago after agents received a tip from a union member.

From that same story:

"On Wednesday, hundreds of people lined up outside the plant to apply for jobs as news of the raid spread. A billboard had gone up last week, before the raid, saying the company was hiring."

I understand that those here illegally just want to work and make a better living for themselves, but not at the expense of Americans trying to do the same thing. That is exactly what was happening here, and who knows where else. Mississippi has an unemployment rate of 8.5%, much higher than the national 6%.

And this company, Howard Industries, they should have some executives and upper management facing serious legal ramifications. Just like the executives at Tyson Foods after that bust in Iowa.

There Ain't no Politics Worse Than Little League Politics

2008-08-25T22:29:00.007-04:00

My dad, who played college baseball and was drafted by the Tigers organization (never played minor league ball due to an injury) knows more about baseball than the average Joe. So when we were little, he agreed to help assistant coach our Little League All-Stars, of which my younger brother was one.

I was too young to comprehend exactly what Dad found himself a part of, but I knew he was absolutely disgusted. We didn't play in that league next season, which represented half the county, and instead enrolled us in another one farther away.

People remembered. The petty sort who love their local county power. My brothers, who were much better ball players than I, though I was no slouch, always has a wary eye turned towards them by some in the adult baseball clique.

So when I read this story about a 9-year old banned from pitching in his league because he's too good, I am highly sympathetic to his coach's claims that it is merely political. The petty sort are not above shutting down a talented 9-year old because he beats them too easily.

Even if (highly doubtful in my opinion) this child actually has been banned from pitching due to some fuzzy-wuzzy sense of fairness or self-esteem... Why?!

If you're an average player at that age group and you strike out against the pitching stud in your league, there is no shame in that. Your teammates all did the same thing. Now, if during one of those games you manage to connect on the ball and line a double down the gap, you remember that. Panting as you brush the dirt off your pants standing on second, rearranging the batting helmet just a bit too big for you so you can check the third base coach for signals... that's self esteem right there.

VDH Succinctly Makes the Point I Would Have

2008-08-22T19:03:00.002-04:00

From Mr. Hanson at NRO:

Let me get this straight: getting a Senate and House majority to authorize a bipartisan joint war-resolution, going to the UN, assembling a coalition, having a national and world debate on the wisdom of such an operation from December 2001 to March 2003, and then attacking a genocidal dictator, and staying on to foster a constitutional democracy are apparently the same "charge" "example" as an autocracy suddenly invading its democratic neighbor during the Olympics, and staying on to annex some of its territory?

Which brings up a question: If President, would Obama's sizable streak of liberal guilt handicap him in dealing decisively in an international crisis such as Georgia.

Obama: Why Aren't We More Like China?

2008-08-22T11:34:00.004-04:00

Wow, how incredibly naive, foolish, or both is the current Democratic nominee.

Let me make just one of many points that should be obvious to anybody out there with a functioning brain.

Yes, the Chinese economy is growing and industrializing, but they don't have to deal with all that annoying debate about how to plan their economic moves. Yes, it does have its advantages, but there are some negatives as well.

Maybe Sen. Obama should talk to these two grandmothers about what exactly those negatives could be.

HT: Hotair

Not Cool!

2008-08-19T23:46:00.002-04:00

From the AP:

"LeRoi Moore, saxophone player for the Dave Matthews Band, died Tuesday of injuries suffered in an accident on an all-terrain vehicle in June. He was 46."

This registers high on the level of suck.

College flashbacks listening to that one.

Private Apologies are Nice But...

2008-08-16T16:50:00.004-04:00

Have you ever made a real jack-ass comment on another person's blog, and then a few hours or the next morning recall what you had typed, and felt embarrassed if not just a wee bit ashamed?

Nope, me neither.

No seriously, I'm recently guilty. My sincere apologies to those whose discussion I polluted. Not cool on my part, at all. I'm better than that, or should be, and the folks involved are better than to have to deal with it also.

Feel Good Friday, Just This Once

2008-08-15T13:10:00.003-04:00

I'll leave the regular Friday Feel Gooding to others out there in internet land, (yeah I know, mostly Tennessee) but since I'm going to be seeing these guys tomorrow down at Waterfront Park for an outdoor concert, how about some My Morning Jacket.

WWHSTD?

2008-08-13T21:37:00.005-04:00

It looks like the President is sending Georgia relief aid, and he is noticeably going to use our military to do it. It looks like the Russians may have won the provinces of South Odessia and Abkhazia, while the other provinces of Georgia should be under Tbilisi's control.

It is to ensure that the rest of Georgia remains under Tbilisi's control Bush is sending the military to delivery the aid, so Putin doesn't get the idea to grab for more.

Georgia is split in two by Russia on one side, and the US and her allies on the other, and we're airlifting support and aid while simultaneously drawing a line in the sand.

A firm but not reckless reaction to Moscow's aggression...

An example of history repeating itself?

The President of Georgia Speaks, With Five Presidents Behind Him

2008-08-12T23:45:00.006-04:00

Check out the mass of people gathered to hear Geogian President Saakashvili speak. Behind him are five presidents of former Soviet-bloc countries (Ukraine, Poland, Lithuania, Latvia, and Estonia) who know full well what it means to face oppression from Moscow.

Very impressive stuff.

Something both amazing and chilling to watch -- the red and white Georgian flags proudly waved -- and notice that here or there, you can see the ol' Red, White, and Blue herself hoisted in solidarity as well.

I highly recommend you watch the clip.

Concerning Georgia, Powerline Lays the Smackdown on Jimmy Carter II

2008-08-09T21:57:00.008-04:00

Read the whole dang thing, but here's the knockout punch. And it's a doozy.

*****

"Ben Smith [in the Politico] recounts that Russia's Washington public relations firm contacted reporters to remind them that McCain foreign policy adviser Randy Scheunemann has lobbied for Georgia. Unbelievably, the Obama campaign aligned itself squarely with Vladimir Putin, putting out a statement that echoed the Russian PR firm's:

"John McCain's top foreign policy adviser lobbied for, and has a vested interest in, the Republic of Georgia and McCain has mirrored the position advocated by the government,' said Obama spokesman Hari Sevugan."

In the common sense-free world of Barack Obama, advocating for a fledgling democracy that is trying to align itself with the West and is threatened by the imperial aspirations of Russia constitutes a "conflict of interest."

The McCain camp responded with this statement:

The Obama campaign's attacks on Randy Scheunemann are disgraceful. Mr. Scheunemann proudly represented a small democracy that is one of our closest allies in a very dangerous region. Today, many are dead and Georgia is in crisis, yet the Obama campaign has offered nothing more than cheap and petty political attacks that are echoed only by the Kremlin. The reaction of the Obama campaign to this crisis, so at odds with our democratic allies and yet so bizarrely in sync with Moscow, doesn't merely raise questions about Senator Obama's judgment--it answers them."

*****

And while you're there, read this post as well.

Part of a statement from the McCain camp:

"I strongly support the declaration issued by the Presidents of Poland, Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania, and their commitment that 'aggression against a small country in Europe will not be passed over in silence or with meaningless statements equating the victims with the victimizers.'"

The recently liberated peoples of Poland, Estonia, Latvia, and Lithuania are more than aware of how Russia plays the game, and the tendency among some in the West to passively demure with diplomatic cowardice. I do not know if that statement was a reaction to this statement, but it sure could be.

"It’s both sides’ fault — both have been somewhat provocative with each other."

Who was that statement made by? Answer: Mark Brzezinski, advisor to Barack Obama, and son of Zbigniew Brzezinski, National Security Advisor to Jimmy Carter.

Barack Obama = Jimmy Carter II

Rabies-Infected Vampire Bats!

2008-08-09T20:40:00.002-04:00

Seriously, next time I complain about something stupid or trivial, I should think about this story.

CARACAS, Venezuela (Aug. 8) -- At least 38 Warao Indians have died in remote villages in Venezuela, and medical experts suspect an outbreak of rabies spread by bites from vampire bats.

And I'm annoyed about needing to get my brakes fixed on my car.

"Find Out Where His Kids Go to School" ~ Senator Mike Gravel (D)

2008-08-06T00:09:00.010-04:00

This from Sen. Mike Gravel, a Democrat who was a US Senator from Alaska, and a candadate for President in the Democratic primaries.

The link, and the disgusting audio.

"Find out where he [Gordon Kromber, a US attorney prosecuting a suspected Al Qaeda operative] lives. Find out where his office is. If you've got some chutzpah - which is a word that you don't hear often - if you've really got it, find out where he lives, find out where his kids go to school, find out where his office is; picket him all the time. Call him a racist in signs if you see him. Call him an injustice. Call him whatever you want to call him, but in his face all the time. They can't take the heat; deliver it to them. We have to stop laying down to these injustices."

From the linked article:

"'That sounds very, very dangerous and sketchy,' said Bobby Chesney, a Wake Forest University law professor who studies national security law. It's fine to criticize the government, he said, but it is an entirely different matter to engage in such aggressive speech targeting the children of a federal employee."

While Mr. Chesney as a professional expert is lucid and strong in his stringent condemnation, let me repeat in my own more amateurish yet brutish manner for those who are too thick skulled or (more likely, sadly) those who are just too radically left-wing and partisan and therefore likely to be intentionally obtuse unless I make this point ridiculously obvious...

"Find out where his kids go to school."

Again, just for repetition's sake, again and again and again.

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school.

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

"Find out where his kids go to school."

And for all my liberal readers and fellow bloggers who love to talk about their sons and daughters, to post pictures of their neices and nephews, imagine if it was your precious loved ones that this Senator was attempting to get this audience to stalk; to scope out where these innocents attended school.

Again, the damning, damning to hell audio.

HT: NRO

The Race for President Just Pulled Even

2008-08-01T04:52:00.007-04:00

I've been away from the computer and politics for the past day or two, so this 'controversy' snuck on me. (Can't say I really miss it though.)

The current ad by the McCain campaign comparing Obama to Paris Hilton and Brittney Spears and their superficial celebrity status is a bit stupid, to be honest. It makes a point, don't get me wrong, about similarities between the temporal rockstar quality of Sen. Obama's current hip status, and those of other celebrities who now have some tarnish on them.

If you want my honest opinion, unpersuasive if ultimately harmless.

However, the Obama campaign in responding to it, instead of merely mocking it, busted out the race card, as Rich Lowry fairly well sums it up:

"Jesse Jackson must have been forgiven by the Obama campaign and welcomed into its inner circle. Because it sure seems as if he’s giving the campaign advice."

This ad is racist, because you see, Paris and Brittney are white, and you know how black men like their white women. (wink wink nod nod)

Bull manure.

Those two women are also vapid creatures on a first name basis within our current tabloid media culture, adored one day and mocked the next, and this ad in no way says that Obama wants to do dirty erotic things to them, or any other dirty blonde out there, yet this blatant playing of the race card first by the netroots, then The New York Times, and now the candidate himself will only backfire. Hard.

You think the American public wants to potentially need to defend itself against the charge of racism anytime there is some sort of criticism to make of the Chief Executive for the next four or eight years? Hardly.

And by the backtracking the Obama campaign is doing concerning what Obama meant by his 'dollar bill' comment, they realize the self-inflicted damage that has been done. Not necessarily too late, but not necessarily soon enough, either.

Obama's campaign just made him with this episode, unnecessarily I must emphasize, the racial candidate, with all the baggage that implies. Not Hope, and not Change, but the common and worn-thin old racial politics.

The race is brand new, both campaigns now start at even, and it now depends on how they finish this last 100 days to determine which man will be out next President. Obama just sacrificed his advantage over an opponent's ad comparing him to Brittney Spears. (!?) Simply astounding.

The Terrance and Phil of Ur

2008-07-31T23:15:00.003-04:00

The oldest known recorded joke in human history dates back to Sumer approximately 1900 BC, and is... a flatulence joke. Some things never do change, and human nature is I guess one of them.

So in "honor," a more modern take.

Libertarian Politics in Kentucky Isn't Just News, It's Fark

2008-07-29T23:04:00.005-04:00

It's always a pleasant surprise to click a link at Fark and find you are taken to an article at the local paper's website.

It concerns a former actor from Predator (another one?!) running for the US Senate who is a bit too out there even for the Libertarian Party.

Have we really reached the point where we are so politically correct that we can't even call Middle Easterners "camel dung shovelers" out on the campaign trail?

A Glorious, But Sticky, Anniversary

2008-07-24T22:47:00.006-04:00

Today is the 25th anniversary of the Pine Tar Incident. The day when George Brett... just... completely... lost it. Here's a good article by Tim Kurkjian at ESPN.com about this classic. A snippet:

"Brett said he was sitting on the bench after the homer, and at the same time, the umpires were conferring at home plate.

"I had no idea what they were talking about," Brett said. "Then McClelland laid the bat on the ground, I looked at [teammate] Frank White on the bench and said, 'What the hell are they doing now?' Frank said, 'They're measuring for pine tar.' I turned to Frank and, I think, Vida Blue, and said, 'If they call out on that, I'm going to run out there and kill those SOBs.'"

They did call out on that. And thus, a legend is born.

It never gets old.

The Digital Nicotine Review of Dark Knight, Which I Watched Last Night.

2008-07-24T19:19:00.005-04:00

Go watch it. Extremely good, my highest recommendation, but... damn. Give yourself about fifteen minutes after the movie to decompress.

But Not a Real Green Dress, That's Cruel

2008-07-22T22:12:00.012-04:00

On July 12, at an outdoors Barenaked Ladies concert at the Horseshoe Casino just across the river in southern Indiana, I proposed to The Girlfriend.

She is now The Fiance, and it still doesn't seem real.

I had the moment planned out. Go to the show. Enjoy. Wait for the band to play "If I Had $1,000,000." Pull ring box from cargo shorts pocket. Get down on one knee. Propose. Get The Now-Fiance all gooey-eyed emotional. She says yes. Near-by onlookers cheer.

It actually worked out better than that.

I knew some of her friends were going to the concert as well, but figured they would be seated somewhere else at the show. I did not realize it was general seating, and that we would all be sitting together. This would end up to be fortuitous. So when I came across our friend Mark, I gave him a heads up on the plan.

"Oh," he said, a bit surprised. "Well, I guess congratulations."

The Barenaked Ladies played through their whole set -- great stuff -- and the show 'ended,' but no "If I Had $1,000,000," which is a bit nerve-wracking because there is a part of you that wants to get the whole thing over with. All their other big songs like "One Week," "It's All Been Done," "Pinch Me," and "Brian Wilson," were already played. (A minor complaint, they didn't play "Call and Answer," which is one of my favorites, but I digress.) So I figure encore, and after that well-worn tradition of the band exiting the stage, the crowd cheering and the band 'relenting' and coming back for more, they opened up their encore with, finally, that song.

I can see Mark, looking over his shoulder while trying not to be obvious, turning a bit to see the proposal. I get down on one knee, nervous and feeling a bit surreal, and I tap The Girlfriend on the waist. "What?" She turns, looks around, and then down, and stares at me for a second or two. "[Girlfriend], will you marry me?"

Still shocked. Then she gets gooey-eyed emotional and says yes. I stay down on one knee for five or ten seconds as I fit the ring on her finger. Kerri who is sitting in front of us with some of her friends turns around after Mark tells her to look, and goes absolutely nuts; but in a bit of prescience, whips out her cell phone and gets a picture of me kneeling before my future wife, so now those momentous but fleeting few seconds are forever preserved thanks to her. Fortuitous indeed.

The Fiance had no clue it was coming. Absolutely stunned. The rest of the show is a bit of a happy blur, with a few "I love yous" shared, and some "atta boys" given from nearby observers.

And then The Fiance gets to go to a friend's 30th birthday party later that evening with a nice new piece of jewelry, and her future husband, to show off to everyone.

Better than planned. And of course, here is the song that I proposed to:

If I Had $1,000,000...
I'd build a tree fort in our yard.
If I Had $1,000,000...
You could help, it wouldn't be that hard.
If I Had $1,000,000...
Maybe we could put put a little tiny fridge in there somewhere.